Thursday, 3 October 2013

Trinny's Fashion Faux Pas

The biggest fashion faux pas in decades committed twice within the past fortnight has London paparazzi on high alert. If you believe it has anything to do with a model hitting the rocks exiting her limo in commando, or a wardrobe malfunction that flips the television censorship certification to ‘18 and over’, think again…It has everything to do with a premier fashion guru hitting the town with an odious accessory that women-in-their-right minds would rather see hanging by his toenails.

Her name is Trinny Woodall. She is known in the UK as part of a duo ‘Trinny & Susannah’. The two are television fashion presenters who specialize at turning Ms Frumpies into Ms Fabbies. Susannah used to date Princess Margaret’s son, Viscount Linley. She is married with children, is chirpy, chilled and settled. Her counterpart, however, is single mother and by the looks of it, is helping the multi-millionaire on the rebound lick his wounds.

Trinny possesses glossy looks and an enviable figure. At forty-seven, she smacks of cool and can carry off anything. Well, almost…

The questionable accessory on her arm is none other than Charles Saatchi. He, too, formed part of a famous twosome: Saatchi & Saatchi, a leading advertising agency. Charles branched into the art world. His Midas touch has granted instant celebritydom for many a YBA, or Young British Artist, the likes of Damien Hirst and Tracey Emin.

The seventy-year-old magnate owns the spectacular and sunny Saatchi Gallery a stone’s throw from my house. Until about a year ago, when Starbucks stopped making the kind of coffee he likes, I saw him regularly standing quietly in the queue dressed in his trademark black suit and a white shirt. His style might be anything but exciting, but it sure qualifies as his ‘trademark look’.

Charles Saatchi’s second wife is the certified British Domestic Goddess, Nigella Lawson. The shocking split and speedy divorce went achingly public: no one suspected that trouble brewed in paradise. To the outside the couple had it all: Nigella’s stellar culinary career and Charles, happily amassing his art collection. The only sparks around the couple came from their neighbours over their planning approval to dig out a floor or two under their huge Chester Square home. 

The photos snapped at Scott’s restaurant of Saatchi grabbing Nigella by the throat spilled the beans. Women’s hackles across the country rose, men stood posed to intervene, fists clenched.

Bodacious Nigella made an immediate and discrete exit for Los Angeles to further her career across the pond; the seventy-year-old threw public wobblies and threatened to kill himself. But the injured party refused to be drawn in.

Three and a half months later, the press exposed Mr Saatchi enjoying another romantic tête-a-tête with Trinny at the same restaurant he clamped his fingers around his ex-wife’s neck.

The Fashion Police are labelling Trinny a Shebug. I would rather give her the benefit of the doubt. After all, for somebody who has gone through re-hab and has suffered from low self-esteem issues, is the  Shebug catnip Charles Saatchi package worth losing her head over?

Only time will tell...

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