Wednesday, 28 August 2013

Spider Woman Gets Panned

I’m not talking about acid-tongue Joan Rivers and her Acolytes today but about the press: ‘fashionista’ Shebugs are feverishly digging into the alabaster skin of an accomplished actress one of the few who possesses an aesthetic eye. Let’s face it: Audrey Hepburn, touchstone of impeccability, will forever trump the likes of a Courtney Love or a Rhiannon hand down. My friend who ran Chanel in Spain told me that Penelope Cruz was clueless when it came to selecting the right clothes. This is why designers and stylists are paid fortunes to make them look good.

Cate Blanchett is the fashionista Shebug’s target. The cool blonde remains one of the few Hollywood heavy weights guaranteed to swan onto the red carpet - or anywhere else, perfectly polished. Another contender of this elusive ilk is Nicole Kidman, though she does not have the clean-cut sleekness of her fellow Antipodean. Cate is a master of showcasing her assets with stylish elegance, femininity and dignity.

Christopher Kane designed the offending dress that  is being ripped to shreds. The spider web motif is madly theatrical but done in a quiet way with the black lattice floating whimsically on a nude background. 

Would I choose it? No, but I’m not walking down the red carpet nor promoting my new movie, am I? One quote reads:  “Unflattering: the 44-year-old Oscar winner’s halter gown looked as though it was assembled quickly and without regard for things like symmetry or proper fit”...Nothing personal, but THIS is a BAD fit!

Cate has kept everything else deliciously muted. Only her sky-blue eyes pop. It’s the uniqueness of the dress that does the talking. And isn’t that what her stylist is trying to achieve as well? Still not convinced? Simply contrast Cate Blanchett to her fellow actress...

The unimaginative way to get the paparazzi’s attention is to flash a lot of skin.  Angelina Jolie did just that when she wore that black thigh-high slit dress: people were talking about ‘that leg’ for weeks. But it was Jennifer Aniston who pulled it off in a much less aggressive way with her sun-kissed skin and airy high heel sandals.

These are veritable no-nos Shebug fashionistas have every right in the world to feast on, wouldn't you agree?

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